The dopest dummy text on the Internet, ya heard?

Click on the rapper above to get your text.

Allow me to reintroduce myself. I invented swag. Poppin' bottles, puttin' supermodels in the cab. Yo, I'm makin' short term goals, when the weather folds. Just put away the leathers and put ice on the gold. Chilly with enough bail money to free a big Willy. High stakes, I got more at stake than Philly. Let's stick up the world and split it 50/50. Photo shoot fresh, looking like wealth, 'bout to call the papparazzi on myself. Can't leave rap alone, the game needs me. I'm outchere ballin', I know you see my sneaks. Look I'm on my grind cousin, ain't got time for frontin, sensitive thugs ya'll all need hugs. I'm not a biter, I'm a writer for myself and others. I say a B.I.G. verse I'm only bigging up my brother. I paid a grip for them jeans, plus the slippers is clean. Hova flow, the Holy Ghost, get the hell up out your seats. This ain't for iTunes, this ain't for sing-a-longs. This is black hoodie rap. Get your fatigues on, all black everything: Black cards, black cars, all black everything. So we living life like a video, where the sun is always out and you never get old and the champagne's always cold and the music's always good and the pretty girls just happen to stop by in the hood. I'm liable to go Michael, take your pick. Jackson, Tyson, Jordan, Game 6. Only god can judge me, so I'm gone. Either love me or leave me alone.

You are now watching the throne, don't let me get in my zone. You tellin' me people don't look at Kanye West like the glitch? I really do believe that the world can be saved through design, and everything needs to actually be 'architected.' Because I sit back and think 'Am I the only one that's not crazy? I'm a creative genius and there's no other way to word it. This one Corbusier lamp was, like, my greatest inspiration. Nobody can tell me where I can and can't go. Man, I'm the number one living and breathing rock star. I am Axl Rose; I am Jim Morrison; I am Jimi Hendrix. I'm Walt Disney. I'm like Howard Hughes. I'm like David Stern. I'm like Steve Jobs. If anything, that's a compliment to them. I'm like Michelangelo cause I'm the new version of that. You don't think that I would be one of the characters of today's modern Bible? I understand culture. I am the nucleus. It's only led me to awesome truth and awesomeness. Beauty, truth, awesomeness. That's all it is. You will believe in yourself. I'm just the espresso. I feel like a little bit, like, I'm the Braveheart of creativity. I just wanted to tell everyone I gave Sway his first TV. And he needs to remember that. I'm 10 years ahead of your mentality. But I'm a champion so I turned tragedy to triumph, make music that's fire, spit my soul through the wire.

2 chainz, four bracelets. She got a big booty so I call her "Big Booty." I am smoking on that gas, life should be on Cinemax. All I get is cheese, like I'm taking pictures. Tupac without a nose ring. Thug life: one wife, a mistress and a girlfriend. When I die, bury me inside the Gucci store. Pull up to the scene with my ceiling missing. Might valet park a Brinks truck. Let's play big bank take little bank. You are looking at a shark in a fish tank. Crocodile, the gator type. I'm allergic to the hater type. Where's Paris Hilton? Where's Kat Stacks? I'm Rambo with this ammunition, my camo came from Tru Religion. My Boost Mobile chirping, it might be my amigo. Dreads hang on designer everything, Mr. Comme des Garçons, Mr. Alexander Wang. And I'm known to kick it like the captain of a soccer team. And I ain't crazy but if that's my baby then we gonna have to name that little baby Mercedes. I be laughing to the bank all you do is giggle. If you know me, then you know I've been thinking Franklin, money, thousands, Tru Religion trousers. Catch up to my campaign, coupe the color of mayonnaise. Rain, pourin. All my cars is foreign. All my broads is foreign. Money tall like Jordan. Got a private home started from the public houses. This that sauce, this that dressing. Hair weave killer causing her arousal. Audi A8, told em, outtie 5000.

Started. October very's own but it looks like July 4. I know way too many people here right now that I didn't know last year. I swear I could beat Serena when she playing with her left. Oh yeah, that's right, I'm doing me. I can you teach you how to speak my language, Rosetta Stone. I was running through the 6 with my woes. I might be too strung out on compliments, overdosed on confidence. Tuck my napkin in my shirt cause I'm just mobbin' like that. She said they miss the old Drake. Girl don't tempt me. All my exes live in Texas like I'm George Strait. I learned working with the negatives could make for better pictures. How you feel, how you feel, how you feel? 25 sittin' on $25 mil. And this girl right here, who knows what she knows? So I'm going through her phone if she go to the bathroom. Where ya at? I gave you the keys, told ya bring it right back. I wear every single chain even when I'm in the house. There used to never want to hear us, remember? Bar mitzvah money like my last name Mordecai. I'm the light-skinned Keith Sweat. After hours of Il Mulino or Sotto Sotto, just talkin' women and vino. The contract like '91 Dan Marino. We got Santa Margherita by the liter. Last name, ever. First name, greatest. Me and 40 back to work but we still smell like a vacation. YOLO.

Kendrick have a dream. I am a sinner who's probably going to sin again. Playstation and some drank. Technology bought my soul. Got me breathing with dragons. I crack the eggs in your basket. I'm Marilyn Manson with madness, now just imagine the magic. Start up that Maserati and 'Vroom! Vroom' I'm racing. I got 25 lighters on my dresser. I can feel your energy from two planets away. I got my drink, I got my music. I would share them both today. I can feel the changes. I can feel the people around me just want to be famous. If I told you that a flower bloomed in a dark room, would you trust it? Really I'm a sober soul but I'm with the homies right now. I never was a gangbanger. I mean I was never a stranger to the folk neither. It go Halle Berry or hallelujah. Pick your poison tell me what you doing. Would you say my intelligence now is great relief? And it's safe to say our next generation maybe can sleep with dreams of being a lawyer and doctor, instead of a boy with a chopper. Pipe down on the curb when you heard that I got these words to the upper echelon, that's excellent. I am the bad, the good God, the last the hood got. The last that would try to pass a good job. If Shawn's a Beatle than I need a ten-second drum solo. See you at Woodstock.

Keep your heart, Three Stacks, keep your heart. Play your part. On the oak tree, I hope we feel like this forever. Forever ever? But I know you wanted that 808. Can you feel that B-A-S-S bass? Ah ha, hush that fuss. Everybody move to the back of the bus. Do you wanna bump and slump with us? We the type of people that make the club get crunk. As the plot thickens it gives me the dickens, reminiscent of Charles. When I met my SpottieOttieDopalicious angel, I can remember the damn thing like yesterday. Sir Lucious gots gator belts and patty melts and Monte Carlos. This is my story, this is my song and to them rudypoos don't attempt to try this at home. Chonkyfire, spiced with rock n' roll. Indubitably, piper pied. And if I see you in the streets I'd dap you down like you was Greg. YKK on your zipper. Don't everybody like the smell of gasoline? Don't everybody like the taste of apple pie? Long as you know consequences are givin' for living. Like a million elephants and silverback orangutans, you can't stop a train. Real guys go for real down-to-Mars girls. I will be present on the first day of school and graduation. Cause I'm cooler than a polar bear's toenails. Now breaker, breaker 10-4 can I get some reply. Time to drop these 'bows like Dusty Rhodes. Let bygones be bygones, you can go and get the hell on, you and your momma.

Let me begin baby, my name is Bronsolino. Eat steaks off a cold plate. Stoned, listening to Coldplay. Hide spinach like a doomsday prepper. Every Sunday I'm in Tuesday leather. My beard look like Uday and Qusay. Zero to 60 in a Porsche like a cheetah. The moon's reflections off the lake hit me. All I see is C-notes, silk shirts at the casino. The face is silky like a tablecloth. My shorty gallop in the morning on the beach like a Chilean horse. I fixed the game between Georgia Southern and Grambling. I'm sitting at the outdoor desk with my pants off. I'm Eric Clapton in the black Benz. The peppered steak was salty but I ate it cause I love her. Catch me on the run with a Nevada nurse. Suede snake, crocodile silk. Let me take it out to Coney Island. Now write your name 100 times on the blackboard. In the Z3 bumping U2. Ginger ale laying in the Knicks cup. Oyster bowls chilling in the cloisters. Six ducks in a wood-burning oven. Two jags. Cincinnati Zubaz. Next year catch me posing at the Tonys. Folding paper wilding at the OTB. Randy Quaid with the turtleneck. Smack the taco out your mouth. State your business cause I'm busy tanning naked. 360 in a Sea-Doo in a tux. Predict the weather by the wind like an old Mayan. Order breasts of veal at Walt Frazier's. Cheerio ship-flip like Rey Mysterio. Eating chicken parmesan in the holding cell.

Okay, hello, it's the Martian. Young money. Excuse my charisma, vodka with a spritzer. So misunderstood but what's the world without enigma? I lost my mind, it's somewhere out there stranded. I need a Winn-Dixie bag full of money right now to the VIP section. Just talked to moms, told her she the sweetest. Talking to myself because I am my own consultant. Paper chasin', tell that paper "Look, I'm right behind ya." Real G's move in silence like lasagna. People say I'm borderline crazy, sorta kinda. Got the Maserati dancing on the bridge. You pop'em cause we pop'em like Orville Redenbacher. But what should I scream for? This is my theme park. You're a goon but what's a goon to a goblin? I don't owe you like two vowels. Even Gwen Stefani said she couldn't doubt me. Met a female dragon, had a fire conversation. Approving million-dollar deals from my iPhone. Flyer than Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice. I got summer hating on me cause I'm hotter than the sun. Got Spring hating on me cause I ain't ever sprung. I parallel park in that red-and-yellow thing, old school Atlanta Hawk. And my chain Toucan Sam, that tropical colors, you can't match that, gotta be abstract. Quick Draw McGraw, I went to art school. I'm about to go Andre the Giant. Gotta handful of stacks, better grab an umbrella. I'm counting all day like a clock on the wall. I'm too clean for the choir.

I know Pablo. Noriega. The real Noriega, he owe a hundred favors. Jose Canseco just snitchin' cause he finished. I feed em steroids to strengthen up all my chickens. I'm dirtier than a reverend fighting Internal Revenue. Wingstop, fat boy need a 10 piece. I don't bop, I do the running dance. As you run through my jungles all you hear is rumbles. Gold medals on my neck, I call it Michael Phelps. Clean as a whistle as I pull out in my Rolls Royce. Talking to the holy ghost in my Bugatti. I'm not a star, somebody lied. All I want for Christmas is my Pyrex. Never feed it after dark, gotta treat it like Gremiln. I think I'm Big Meech. Larry Hoover. I got that Archie Bunker. Stunt so hard, make them come indict me. Let's pull the two-seater out, baby. When I'm alone in my room sometime I stare at the wall. Exotic red bottoms whole body in gold. Elroy Jetson, I'm somewhere out in space. Mr. KFC, VVS's in the watch. James Bond coupe pop clutch 100. Diced pineapples, taking diamonds by the jar. We should listen to this track in my Maybach. I'm a Mike Tyson type of typewriter sniper. Run it back just like it's Walter Payton. Went from Benihana to Bimini in Bahamas. Ballin, ballin like I play for New England. Thought I wouldn't make it, now I'm winning, Timothy Tebow. Corvette so clean you'll think Bruce Springsteen rid that. Bury me a G, ten Jesus pieces.

I'm yo' pusha. This is time, this is my hour. I got a label deal under my mattress. Vultures to my culture. It's a different jingle when you hear these car keys. Your plane's missing a chef. Givenchy fitting like its gym clothes. My Audemar like Mardi Gras, that's Swiss time, that's excellence. That white frost on that pound cake so your Duncan Hines is irrelevant. Lambo, Murcielago, she go wherever I go. Wherever we go, we do it pronto. Gucci Chuck Taylor with the dragon on the side. Legend in two games like I'm Pee Wee Kirkland. Swimming through these streets looking like I'm Shamu. I'm set straight like a perm do it. My niece was 4 when she felt chinchilla. My verses heal like Curtis Mayfield's music. Rebel like Che Guevara, RC Tyco versus Carrera. Let's talk over Mai Tais, waiter top it off. You can't blame 'em, they ain't never seen Versace sofas. Success it what you make it, take it how it from. CNN said I'd be dead by 21. Still move a bird like I'm in bed with Mother Goose. The streets was yours, you're dunce cappin' and kazooin'. Everybody meet Mr. Me Too. Left the game on a high note, flow opera. Canal Streeting my style, like you Internet sharing my files. Puppets on the string like a yoyo, bouncin like a pogo, they prayin I never go solo. Yuugh.